Amicable Divorce
22 February 2024 · Read time: 8 minutes
An amicable divorce is when both parties exhibit agreeable and calm behaviour towards each other throughout the separation process, despite the dissolution of their marriage.
It describes a state where the individuals involved in the divorce are able to maintain cooperation, and opt for a peaceful resolution rather than engaging in conflict.
It's important to note that amicable divorce does not necessarily imply approval or affection towards the situation or the former spouse. Rather, it signifies a mutual mindset focused on resolving issues harmoniously, even amidst feelings of anger or sadness. Amicability in divorce is a conscious choice to prioritise peaceful negotiation and mutual understanding.
What is an amicable divorce?
An amicable divorce entails both spouses collaborating to achieve a favourable outcome for each party involved. This process requires negotiation and compromise, yet fundamentally, it is characterised by a peaceful resolution where conflicts and threats are avoided, and discussions are conducted calmly.
Despite many individuals intending to approach their separation or divorce amicably, intense emotions can sometimes overshadow rational decision-making, leading to actions that may inadvertently harm the other party.
For an amicable separation to truly succeed, each spouse must conscientiously commit to the demanding task at hand. It necessitates a thorough understanding of available options and personal objectives to effectively work towards them.
Although navigating through this process may evoke a myriad of feelings, taking charge of one's circumstances, making decisions for the future, and not allowing the high emotion to derail the effort required.
While it's evident that amicable separations can yield numerous benefits for all parties involved, it's imperative to acknowledge that achieving such an outcome may not always be feasible.
Situations involving domestic or family violence, substance abuse, coercion, or mental health issues significantly diminish the likelihood of an amicable split.
Do you need a lawyer in an amicable divorce?
Legal professionals assist in resolving legal matters, yet when both parties are aligned in pursuing a fair and amicable separation, the need for a lawyer can often be minimised or even avoided, thus saving costs.
Even in an amicable split, a divorce lawyer offers valuable assistance beyond courtroom representation. They provide clarity on separation requirements, offer advice, facilitate the legal enforceability of agreements, and ensure comprehensive coverage of all necessary steps, expediting the process.
Should negotiation or representation become necessary, our divorce lawyers are equipped to assist you effectively.
While the relationship may be genuinely amicable, family law issues can be intricate and having a proficient and experienced lawyer by your side ensures comprehension of your rights, responsibilities, and the legal ramifications of decisions.
Lawyers can also be skilled negotiators, and can be used even in the context of an amicable separation.
At Movement Legal, we specialise in amicable separations and know how to move these forward in a constructive and non-confrontational manner. Contact us if you would like to speak with us about our approach.
The Advantages of Amicable Divorce
Amicable divorce presents numerous advantages compared to traditional adversarial divorce proceedings. Let's take a dive.
- Control
For starters it lets a couple stay in control over decisions rather than having a Judge make and impose a decision on them. - Alleviated emotional burden
Divorce inherently entails emotional strain, yet an amicable or collaborative approach seeks to minimise this by fostering cooperation and empathy. Such a method promotes a more dignified and respectful separation experience. - Affordability
Conventional divorce proceedings often entail significant financial strain, characterised by prolonged courtroom battles and hefty legal fees. In contrast, amicable tends to reduces costs substantially by avoiding prolonged litigation. - Expedited resolution
By sidestepping courtroom confrontations, an amicable divorce typically reaches resolution more swiftly.
Mediation services
Mediation can be a tool for couples to help work through contentious points, or to at least narrow the issues that are in dispute.
Mediation involves an impartial third party facilitating discussions between both parties with the objective of assisting in the negotiation of a mutually agreeable resolution. The mediator acts as a facilitator, advocating for the attainment of an agreement by both parties, while each individual also advocates for their own interests.
How to make a divorce more amicable
An amicable separation or divorce can also be spectrum between more or less levels of amicability. Here are some tips to help make your separation more amicable.
Accept imperfection
Realise that disagreements may persist, and achieving absolute agreement on every detail is unlikely. Focus on addressing the most significant issues fairly rather than striving for perfection.
Communicate effectively
Be mindful of your communication style and tone, striving for clarity and respect in all interactions. Consider the most effective mode of communication for both parties to ensure productive discussions.
Choose legal representation wisely
Select a lawyer who prioritises collaboration over adversarial tactics. A lawyer who fosters a cooperative approach is likely to make a hugely positive contribution to the amicable resolution of your separation.
Clarify your priorities
Determine what matters most to each of you. While the goal is a mutually beneficial outcome, understanding your individual needs and desired outcomes is crucial. Without clarity, it's challenging to navigate compromises effectively.
Educate yourself
Familiarise yourself with the necessary steps involved in your separation or divorce. Acquire knowledge about the decisions that need to be made and how to approach them. Consulting with an experienced divorce lawyer can provide valuable guidance in this regard.
Base negotiations on logic, not emotions
Strive to make decisions free from emotional influence. Instead, focus on logical choices that lead to favourable outcomes for all involved parties. Emotions can cloud judgement and hinder progress in reaching agreements.
Prioritise the children
If children are involved, prioritise their well-being above all else. Keep their best interests at the forefront when making decisions or resolving conflicts. Remembering why you're pursuing an amicable split can help maintain focus during challenging moments.
Pick your battles
Recognise that disagreements may arise, but not every issue warrants confrontation. Choose which conflicts are worth addressing and which can be let go to maintain harmony and progress in the process.
Embrace the pace
Understand that separation or divorce is a lengthy process with numerous decisions to be made. Allow time for adjustment and emotional processing, especially in the early stages when feelings may be heightened.
Handle with care: things to be careful of in an amicable divorce
Don’t delay
Exercise caution against allowing the relatively amicable post-separation relationship to lead to procrastination in settling property matters. The crucial point to remember is that the asset pool under consideration is not frozen at the time of separation but continues to evolve. The only way to establish a definitive point for asset allocation is by concluding your settlement.
An ex-partner's delay in settling property matters can be aggravating, exasperating, and potentially detrimental to your final asset distribution. Whether their actions stem from malice, ignorance, inertia, or self-interest, it's imperative to take swift action. Doing so not only resolves the issue swiftly, minimising unnecessary stress, but also ensures you receive your rightful share.
Have a fall back plan if things change
Even in the most harmonious of circumstances, individuals can encounter obstacles on certain issues, and it is common to reach an impasse on one particular issue where their perspectives diverged significantly.
An amicable divorce doesn't necessarily imply proceeding without having legal representation. Instead, it entails collaboratively developing strategies with your lawyer to align with your goal of achieving a peaceful separation.
Don’t allow the ‘good vibes’ to blind you from pursuing your entitlements
Be cautious during a amicable divorce, as the constructive dynamics may inadvertently lead you to agree on terms that fall short of what you are rightfully entitled to.
You need to make sure not to allow yourself to be gaslighted or taken advantage of during this process.
Furthermore, it's essential to maintain a realistic perspective. Achieving an amicable separation requires the cooperation of both parties from start to finish. While it's important to remain vigilant, it's equally vital not to succumb to undue alarm.
Early and comprehensive information-gathering is key.
Consider all potential outcomes, even in scenarios where both parties have the best of intentions, and seek expert guidance from a family lawyer to ensure that your decisions are well-informed and in the best interests of yourself and your family.
Lawyer specialising in amicable divorce
Our firm specialises in working with individuals through amicable separation. We are very aware that traditional adversarial nature of family law does not always align with modern families. Feel free to get in touch to see how we can help you.
